All posts by erica42285

About erica42285

Glitter, cheap silver, twangy music, flannel shirts, crunchy leaves, chilly air, callused hands, and full hearts.

My Current Guilt-Free 3

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Did y’all think I disappeared?  I’m still here. Don’t you fret!

I think I owe you all an updated GF3. I honestly can’t even remember the last time I did one. August maybe? So since then, I’ve had a nugget and my tastes haven’t necessarily changed, but I am struggling with this a little bit.

It’s no secret that I’ve gone after the burly, brawny men. Bigger guys, manly, sometimes with a gut (I love you, Chris Pratt pre-superhero status). Part of me is wildly attracted to Nick Offerman. I don’t know.

And then things happen. Things like Harry Styles finding his way into my life. And at first I was disgusted. I mean, come on. A dude with skinny jeans whose sprinkled in tattoos like a careless cupcake that fell into a pile of sprinkles. But I’ll be damned, he’s in my Guilt-Free 3 right now. I DON’T WANT HIM TO BE. But I also can’t help myself.

So here we go:

#1 – Harry Styles

Seriously, please don’t judge me. I really can’t help it. I don’t know what it is about him. I hate men in skinny jeans. I hate super skinny men. I hate careless tattoos. But I love boy bands. And I love long hair. And I love those eyes and that smile and the goofy guy I assume he is. I love the fact that he probably calls people “love.” I honest to goodness couldn’t sing you a 1D song. All I know is that I love Harry.

And this is admitting a lot – but I also love the dirty dark Harry that shows up in the fanfiction I find (DON’T JUDGE ME).  Never mind, judge me. Because I must be stopped. STOP READING FANFICTION. YOU ARE 30 YEARS OLD.  Harry was born in 1991. I’m Dirty & 30. I’m going to shut up now.

One Direction Performs On NBC's "Today"

#2 – Scott Eastwood

If you follow my other blog, you know that I just wrote a scathing review about The Longest Ride and what a terrible move it is. The only thing that kept me looking (at least until halfway through the movie when I walked out) was Scott Eastwood and that killer smile. So he is still welcome in my GF3…so long as he doesn’t try to act.

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#3 – Jake Johnson

Weird, right? Kinda weird? I don’t know. After watching New Girl  and Drinking Buddies (obsessively, might I add), I am all about this dude. I like that he’s not ripped. I like that he’s a little dirty and that he has a beard and likes beer. Maybe this isn’t weird. Maybe this one makes more sense than anything.

JakeJohnson

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Send Me Your Guilt-Free 3

Guilt Free 3 – #5

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Guys…one Chris has taken the spot of another. Chris Hemsworth has been letting me down lately. He’s not around! I mean, I know he’s got a toddler daughter and twin sons. He’s busy. I get it. But not showing me that sexy bod is grounds for being kicked out of the GF3.

But don’t worry–a Chris is still on top. Chris Pratt.  Read on.

#1 – Chris Pratt

I believe I said last time, when I introduced Pratt to my GF3, “I even found him adorable as a chubby Parks & Rec guy…but holy crap.”  I can find no fault with this guy. He’s just hilarious and wonderful and he can rap Eminem, he can French braid, he steals costumes to make kids smile, and he’s generally just an awesome guy. Oh, and he went full-frontal for Amy Poehler in Parks & Rec. Watch the video–totally worth it:

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Also, you want to make a pregnant woman ache? Show her Chris Pratt with a baby. So achy. So hot.

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So here’s to you, Chris Pratt. You’re my #1!

#2 – Mark Duplass

My husband made me start watching The League. At first, I thought, “I hate fantasy football.” And then I saw Mark Duplass – “Pete Eckhart” in the show. He’s hilarious. He’s beautiful. He’s witty. And apparently he’s very much like his character from The League in real life.  

Mark is the kinda guy that’ll give you his hoodie, then make sweet love to you. 🙂

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2005 Sundance Film Festival - "The Puffy Chair" Portraits

#3 – Whit Wright (American Aquarium)

“Who?” you ask? Whit Wright is the steel guitarist from the band American Aquarium.  He’s rugged and shy and damnit can that man play a steel guitar in a way that will break your heart.

I have two funny stories about Whit.

The first time I saw American Aquarium was Tuesday, February 25, 2014 (6 days before I found out I was pregnant) at the Beachland Ballroom in Cleveland. Mike and I went on a whim after hearing the band and loving it. Poor Whit looked tired and drunk, and like he’d just taken a whore’s bath in the back bathroom–but he was still very cute, very charming. Mike caught me making drunk smiley eyes at him. I got him to smile back a few times. Then I stood like a creepy fan girl in the front row watching him make steel guitar noises.

The second time I saw Whit, Mike and I both knew that I was pretty volatile. It was June 28, 2014 at the House of Blues in downtown Cleveland. I was 4-5 months pregnant, so I’m pretty sure Whit wouldn’t have had me even if I had tried. We watched American Aquarium open for the Turnpike Troubadours and I held a purse in front of my belly the whole time for fear of deafening my fetus. Afterwards, during the Turnpike Troubadours, Whit happened to walk RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. It took me a second, but when I realized it was him, I ran my finger down his back like a creeper. I’m not sure he noticed, but my husband turned and looked at me like I was a complete nut bag. 🙂

Anyway, here’s Whit (who Mike said I can’t have in my GF3 because he’s way too accessible), but I’ve already stroked his back…so…  Hey Whit – call me!

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(far left)

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Send Me Your Guilt-Free 3

Guilt-Free 3 – #4

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It’s been awhile since I updated my Guilt-Free 3, and these pregnancy hormones have created a trend in the latest guys.  Tall, big, blonde. RAWR.

So without further ado, for your viewing pleasure, here is my latest GF3:

#1 – Chris Hemsworth

You didn’t really think I was getting rid of him, right? And he fits the description:  tall, big, blonde.  Again, I say to you, RAWR.

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#2 – Chris Pratt

I even found him adorable as a chubby Parks & Rec guy…but holy crap.

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#3 –  Scott Eastwood

Where can I find you, Scott? I could learn to sail. I could. I swear.

ScottEastwood

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Guilt-Free Three – Roger D.’s Edition

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To follow in Matt’s footsteps, Roger has taken two approaches to the Guilt-Free 3 and offered his female picks, as well as his male picks.  Let’s get it on!

#1 – Brooklyn Decker

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#2 – Charlize Theron

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#3 –  Candace Bailey

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And now for Roger’s Men!

Man Crush #1 – Josh Turner

Meh… 😉

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Man Crush #2 – Chris Hemsworth

You STEP BACK.

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Man Crush #3 – James Franco

What the hell is with you two?

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Send Me Your Guilt-Free 3

Guilt-Free 3 – Matt Sp.’s Edition

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I’m super excited that the Guilt-Free 3 is gaining speed again.  One of my newest coworkers decided to submit his GF3 PLUS a bonus “Man Crush GF3!”  I, for one, am excited, particularly about one of the men on his Man Crush GF3.  I will comment accordingly in italics.

#1 – Shantel VanSanten

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#2 – Lindsey McKeon

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#3 –  Mila Kunis

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And now for Matt’s Men!

Man Crush #1 – Jensen Ackles

NICE. I haven’t seen him in a long time.

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Man Crush #2 – James Franco

Part of me gets it, part of me doesn’t.

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Man Crush #3 – Jason Segel

Yesssss. He’s adorable and wonderful and all the things a good man should be. Nice choice, Matt!

CBS "How I Met Your Mother" Hosts Largest High Speed Dating Event

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Send Me Your Guilt-Free 3

Guilt-Free 3 – 90s TigerBeat/Bop Edition

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“Where have you been?!” you ask?

Well, I’ve been baking a baby. 🙂 I found out I’m pregnant on March 3 and then I was sick for two months, and now my libido is back and it’s time for a new Guilt-Free 3!

We all read TigerBeat and Bop and Teen Beat and 16 magazine (well, we did if we were teenage girls or young gay men) and some of us (ahem me) bought them well into my late teens with some sort of transparent remark in the checkout line about how I was picking it up for my little sister (which I do not have). Holy parentheses.  Do you remember the joy we all experienced when it was a “Super Special Issue”?

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But who am I kidding? When the Backstreet Boys are on the cover and you haven’t gotten a new Nick Pic in a week, you’ll sacrifice your dignity and pick up a teenybopper magazine even if you’re 17 19 21.  Shut up.

So here’s a Guilt-Free 3 dedicated to the beauty that was the Boys of Teenybopper Magazines. I’ll exclude boybands because OBVIOUSLY they would have dominated this thing, and because there were so many classy, beautiful young men in the 90s, I’ll even throw in some honorable mentions.

PLEASE NOTE:  This makes me feel like a pedophile at 29 years old, and HOLY BOWL CUTS.

#1 – Jonathan Brandis

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#2 – Jonathan Taylor Thomas (JTT)

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#3 –  Joey Lawrence

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Honorable Mention #1 – Andrew Keegan

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Honorable Mention #2 – Devon Sawa

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Honorable Mention #3 – Rider Strong

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Send Me Your Guilt-Free 3

Guilt-Free 3 – Local Celebrity Erika Lauren’s Edition!

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I posed the Guilt-Free 3 question to my favorite afternoon radio show, The Alan Cox Show here in Cleveland, and Erika Lauren–one of the hosts–answered me!  Here is her Guilt-Free 3 (and boy are they yummy):

#1 – Ryan Gosling

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#2 – Adam Levine

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#3 –  Alex Pettyfer

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Send Me Your Guilt-Free 3