Did y’all think I disappeared? I’m still here. Don’t you fret!
I think I owe you all an updated GF3. I honestly can’t even remember the last time I did one. August maybe? So since then, I’ve had a nugget and my tastes haven’t necessarily changed, but I am struggling with this a little bit.
It’s no secret that I’ve gone after the burly, brawny men. Bigger guys, manly, sometimes with a gut (I love you, Chris Pratt pre-superhero status). Part of me is wildly attracted to Nick Offerman. I don’t know.
And then things happen. Things like Harry Styles finding his way into my life. And at first I was disgusted. I mean, come on. A dude with skinny jeans whose sprinkled in tattoos like a careless cupcake that fell into a pile of sprinkles. But I’ll be damned, he’s in my Guilt-Free 3 right now. I DON’T WANT HIM TO BE. But I also can’t help myself.
So here we go:
#1 – Harry Styles
Seriously, please don’t judge me. I really can’t help it. I don’t know what it is about him. I hate men in skinny jeans. I hate super skinny men. I hate careless tattoos. But I love boy bands. And I love long hair. And I love those eyes and that smile and the goofy guy I assume he is. I love the fact that he probably calls people “love.” I honest to goodness couldn’t sing you a 1D song. All I know is that I love Harry.
And this is admitting a lot – but I also love the dirty dark Harry that shows up in the fanfiction I find (DON’T JUDGE ME). Never mind, judge me. Because I must be stopped. STOP READING FANFICTION. YOU ARE 30 YEARS OLD. Harry was born in 1991. I’m Dirty & 30. I’m going to shut up now.
#2 – Scott Eastwood
If you follow my other blog, you know that I just wrote a scathing review about The Longest Ride and what a terrible move it is. The only thing that kept me looking (at least until halfway through the movie when I walked out) was Scott Eastwood and that killer smile. So he is still welcome in my GF3…so long as he doesn’t try to act.
#3 – Jake Johnson
Weird, right? Kinda weird? I don’t know. After watching New Girl and Drinking Buddies (obsessively, might I add), I am all about this dude. I like that he’s not ripped. I like that he’s a little dirty and that he has a beard and likes beer. Maybe this isn’t weird. Maybe this one makes more sense than anything.